I have discovered the quickest way to usher fears into your world is to plant a church.

The fears have come (and thankfully gone/disipating) thick and fast. Here’s the current list:

Fear of the team joining us

Yes, you’re right, it is quite an absurd fear until you realise that people are putting on the line friendships, security in a stable church, their faith, finances, worldview and basically everything else. They are doing this because they are caught by God’s vision, hear his ‘yes’ and trust my leadership. That scares the heck out of me if I think about it long enough.

Fear of people not coming to church

This one is a classic fear all pastors face. But Ori and the Holy Spirit keep reminding me we’re about expanding the kingdom of God not amassing a lot of people in one space. Jesus will build his church, we just get to play along.

Fear of too many people

Is this even sillier? Shouldn’t this be a dream come true? I think once you’ve been pastoring for a while you come to feel the weight of responsibility that comes with pastoring people. If we are unable to steward the growth God might bring, then that’s on us. This scares me.

Fear of it not happening at all

Already there have been significant barriers which left me some nights wondering if in fact I was crazy and the church might not even be able to start.

Fear of failing at this

I’ve never been intimated by failure but the thoughts of messing it up so bad that I don’t have a job and a bunch of people are really hurt because of me scares me.

Fear of what failing would do to my team

As I eluded to before this is a burden I think every leader should bare. Not be defined by, but should definitely be aware of.

Fear of too many Christians coming along

The church we’re starting is for people who don’t yet have a faith in God. They aren’t Christians and likely have no idea of God’s crazy love for them. If all the seats are taken up by Christians we’ve completely missed our target.

Fear of what it will be like when people outside of faith come along

Contrary to my last point, what will happen when people of radically different worldviews come along. Oh gosh, it’s going to be fun!

Fear of not having the courage to embrace the growth

We’re already wrestling with what the next plant looks like. Mad I know, given we’re yet to get one service off the ground yet. But doing this, and thinking multi-service pushes me to really stretch in my leadership. I need to keep pushing past the fear.

Fear never goes away, we just disempower and transform it with courage. I want my leadership to be defined by courage, not fear, which is enabled because of faith. My role, as I see it is to have so much faith that all fears are suffocated.